The power of '6'. muhahahahahahahahahah

Whilst sitting at your desk, lift your right-foot off the floor and make clockwise circles. Now, whilst doing this draw the number '6' in the air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction and there's nothing you can do about it!

Woody Allen is a frickin legend! (For one other reason as well as this poem)

'My Next Life'
(by Woody Allen)

In my next life I want to live backwards.
You start out dead and get that out of the way.

Then you wake up in an old people's home
feeling better every day.

You get kicked out for being too healthy,
go collect your pension,
and then when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day.

You work for 40 years until you are young enough to enjoy your retirement

You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous, then you are ready for high-school.

You then go to primary-school,
you become a kid, you play.
You have no responsibilities,
you become a baby until you are born.
And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa-like conditions with central heating and room-sevice on tap, larger quarters every day, and then, Voila!
You finish off as an orgasm.

Life Explained

Life: Explained

A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them.

"Not very long," answered the Mexican.

"But then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?" asked the American.

The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family.

The American asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

"I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs. I have a full life."

The American interrupted, "I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat."

"And after that?" asked the Mexican.

"With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City! From there you can direct your huge new enterprise."

"How long would that take?" asked the Mexican.

"Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years," replied the American.

"And after that?"

"Afterwards? Well my friend, that's when it gets really interesting," answered the American, laughing. "When your business gets really big, you can start buying and selling stocks and make millions!"

"Millions? Really? And after that?" asked the Mexican.

"After that you'll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends."

And the moral of this story is: ......... Know where you're going in life... you may already be there.

'Saw' type actors in a movie adaptation of a book I love imo.

Lalala

Do your homework!

A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,”Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But,changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.”

Some New Year traditions i like from different countries

In Japan, everyone laughs at the stroke of midnight to ensure good luck in the New
Year.
In the Philippines, children jump ten times when the clock strikes twelve, hoping to grow taller in the new year.
In Mexico, some people take out their suitcases and walk around the block,hoping it would help them travel during the next year.

Is somebody watching us???

After spending 8 years in prison for an unfortunate accident, heavy-weight boxer Joey Nardone returns to a solitary life in Philadelphia. His time in prison and the opportunity to reflect has changed him. Feeling like a stranger in his own neighborhood and searching for some semblance of normalcy, he takes a job at the boxing gym where he used to work-out. Joey finds comfort in the familiarity of his old friends.

But his buddies notice a change in Joey Nardone. Where is the spark and zest for life, once inherent in their pal Joey? Joey, struggling to find meaning in life, meets a 14 yr. old Puerto Rican kid named Jesus, who is repeatedly beaten up by the neighborhood bully. The kid, not used to kindness from strangers, has no time for Joey. Life is hard for Jesus, a scrawny boy, who is not only dealing with his peers picking on him at school, but he also has an alcoholic, abusive father to contend with at home. The chemistry between these two unlikely friends; Joey, an over-the-hill over weight ex-boxer and Jesus a target for bullies, is pure synergistic �magic.� They begin a relationship that gives them both a new and inspired life with a purpose: to only �fight for the right.� the life lessons the old boxer teaches the kid are golden. This heartwarming story of two lost souls finding each other on the streets and boxing arenas of Philadelphia, will capture your heart. Because in life SOME THINGS ARE WORTH FIGHTING FOR.The Nail is a story forgiveness, hope and second chances